beefy pop-tarts and funny over-gelled hair

Hello dear reader. I know it’s been awhile and I honestly don’t even know why it’s been so long. You wouldn’t believe how many posts I’ve started writing, got bored with, and then abandoned on my ever growing potential blog post archive. Also, I’ve been having issues with Microsoft Word telling me my version isn’t authentic even though it totally was a month ago before the big computer crash of o’ ten and now has me running around (figuratively of course for the lazy couch potato) backing up files continuously and uninstalling programs then reinstalling them then downgrading them only to find out that I can’t read any of my old documents on the older version of Word so I have to go and use the ‘fake’ one again and hope it doesn’t self destruct or something because then how would I add on to my potential blog post archive?

So before I get to the meat of my post today, or really Pop Tarts chocolate fudge filling, I thought I’d let you guys in on a little of what I was planning on letting you guys in on. And without further ado, a few nuggets of wisdom from my many years of life:

1) I’ve always wanted to meet an icon, a real icon, not the kind of movie stars that I’ve met plenty of before. I wanted to meet Isaac Asimov and Robert Heinlein. And to a lesser extent Arthur C. Clarke, Jules Verne, H.G. Wells. I had the chance to see Ray Bradbury in a lecture before but I don’t think I’ll ever pay money just to see someone. (On a side note I met Dwayne McDuffie creator of Milestone Media, Static, and Static Shock. This part is said in sing song: exciting. Mark Waid was also there. Mark Waid is evil.) Alas, most of these people are long dead, many before my lifetime or in Sri Lanka until their death. And then I found out that Harlan Ellison lives in Los Angeles and got excited again. That is until I watched Dreams with Sharp Teeth, a documentary about him and realized that he is a horrible mean old contentious man and my life can in no way be improved upon by meeting such a man. I can’t understand how Asimov had found such nice things to say about him. It just makes me want to meet Asimov so much more now.

2) Kick-Ass kicks ass. I wanted to write a full review of the movie, the first I’d seen since early February which is a long time to go without a movie for someone that’s not working, but I don’t think anything more needs to be said. Also I think it’s the fact that I can only review things that are sucky because I like to complain. Need to work on that. The review thing, not the complaining thing because complaining really is a lot of fun. Oh, little gossip from Wikipedia, the main actor 19 year old Aaron Johnson is expecting his first child with his 43 year old fiancé. (Is fiancé really spelled with 2 E’s?)

3) Carli D’Amato is a bitch. Neil is stupid but an amazingly awesome dancer. I loved Jay’s face when he said he wouldn’t eat the fish because it came from the sea. Sigh of content. Thank you BBC America for introducing me to this awesome show when the drama of last year’s BBCA find, Skins, got to be too much for me. You know, cheating, jail, infertility, psychosis, abandonment, suicide, murder, death. I just have to think about Simon and his over gelled hair projectile vomiting all over Carli D’Amato’s (2 apostrophes?) little brother. Incidentally, rewatching Skins season 1, Jay played Cassie’s dark hospital boyfriend in Michelle’s episode. Also, in Thomas’ episode from season 3, he really does say he runs like a dog, so full circle, maybe? No. You’re right. No.

4) I’m interested in being able to communicate in different ways but still using English. There are so many ways to say the same thing and we’re not even talking about different languages. It’s like opening your world up to alternate dimensions or something. I’m pretty good at finger spelling. I’ve actually held full conversations with it before. I am somewhat familiar with binary as well. I understand that shirt now about the 10 kinds of people in the world. Those that understand binary and those that don’t. It’s a lot funnier now than it was when I first came upon it. I thought about learning shorthand but that is just way too complicated I realize. It takes about a year to fully master which is way too long to be considered a flighty hobby. So now I’m focusing on morse code. I know E, T, I, A, N, M, S, and O, so the easy ones. I wonder how many things I can say with those letters alone so I don’t have to memorize the whole thing. If I get any good at it, I’ll put a morse post on this blog.

And finally, something amazing has happened. I just found out that the frosting on Kellogg’s pop-tarts while still containing gelatin is created from cows. Isn’t that the best news ever? No more unfrosted strawberry. My world has been open to chocolate fudge, brown sugar cinnamon, strawberry milkshake, blueberry muffin, chocolate chip, oh the list goes on forever but I must mention: frosted strawberry. What a difference a little crushed bone frosting makes on a product. I can stop being so hateful towards my pop-tarts shirt now that I too can partake in that which I’ve been promoting. I think some of my favorite memories are of eating things that were previously forbidden. I remember them all and all mark an important moment of my life. Oreos, marshmallows (though I’m still hoping for a better version than this crap), turkey bacon, pudding, jell-o, skittles. Am I exaggerating? Probably, but you’ll understand too when you take your first bite of this frosted chocolate fudge no pig delight.